Inside Battles


“Your lungs are fine, but -”

My lungs are fine, the doctor said but I somehow forgot how to breathe when she mentioned the word ‘but.’ I was hospitalized for days because of fever and a recurring cough which made me also miss my fifth grade recognition. They were checking for pneumonia through an x-ray but what they found was something else. That March of 2008 permanently made a curve in my life – literally and changed it forever.

“Your lungs are fine, but you have scoliosis.” Scoliosis. The word was foreign to me back then but I welcomed the diagnosis with familiarity as if it were an old friend. As if my mind already knew that it had been there for years and it just finally had a name now. Or maybe it helped that I was staring at an x-ray. My x-ray. My x-ray which seemed to have a letter S for a spine instead of the normal straight line.

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